Cool Phone, Santa

The holidays are here and once again it's time to set aside all those things that are really secondary in our lives - ego, money, power - and remember those things that are truly important. After all, isn't that what Christmas is really all about. Isn't it about escaping the commercialism and consumerism and the traffic and the crowds, and getting back to what fulfills us as human beings? Isn't it really all about...

Hi-tech.

I think so, and don't tell me your not looking forward to some cool little gadgets and gizmos under the tree this Christmas. I know I am (like I really need another sweater - puhleeeeze). So with that in mind I thought I'd offer up a couple of ideas for the gadget freak in your family. These aren't the best Christmas gadgets out there, but just a couple of ideas for the geek on your list. And guys don't forget, it's not just men who are into tech these days. Don't let your Christmas morning turn out like this.

"Oooh honey, What is it?"

"It's a diamond solitaire, sweetheart. I just wanted you to know that I'd marry you all over again."

"A diamond solitaire? But I wanted an IPhone!"

"An IPhone? This is better than an IPhone. It's sentimental. You know how sentimental women are."

"I told you I wanted an IPhone."

"That's a full carat diamond. Look at it. And that's 14k gold. You're supposed to be smiling and glowing when you get something like that. You're supposed to hug me and kiss me and tell me what a wonderful husband I am. You're supposed to..."

"Yeah, well time to wake up and step out of your cave, Mr. Neanderthal man. Does this thing have a chip in it?"

"Yeah, right. Of course it does. When's the last time you saw a piece of jewelry that didn't come with it's own microprocessor."

"Well you don't have to get sarcastic...Look, I'm sorry, ok? It's just that...I do appreciate the thought. Really I do."

"Well, then you like it?"

"I love it. Did you keep the receipt?"

"It's in my wallet."

"Good, the Apple Store will be open tomorrow."


My first gift idea is the perfect product to buy for someone else that you wouldn't buy for yourself. It's an ebook reader called the Kindle, and it was just introduced today. Instead of an LCD screen it uses a technology called e-ink to display the pages, which greatly increases its battery life. It uses special ebooks from Amazon.com and can display b/w images as well as text. It also includes a free wireless connection so that you can shop Amazon and purchase books, magazines and newspapers wherever your in range of Sprint's EVDO high speed cellular network. And you get all this for only (choke)

FOUR HUNDRED DOLLARS.

Personally, I'm made of money so paying $399.00 for an ebook reader means nothing to me, but I'm guessing that most other people will find that price a little steep. Especially bookworms, who are basically cheap to begin with and not inclined to spend a wad of dough for a pricey plastic gizmo when a good ol' dog-eared, coffee-stained paperback would do just as well. Hell, most bookworms won't even spend money on hygiene and new clothes let alone a $400.00 ebook reader.

It's the kind of gift one book lover could give to another though, especially if the giftee spends a lot of time on the road. It's nice and portable, can around 200 books, and can even play MP3's and audiobooks from Audible.com. If only it didn't cost so much.

My second Christmas gift is for the budding Steve Vai in the family. I just bought one of these myself and it's cheap (around $90.00). It's called the Guitarport and it's a little box that allows an electric guitar to connect to a Mac or PC via a USB port. It's made by the folks at Line 6 who also make amplifers and other electronic musical goodies, and I'd say even the most burnt-out, brain dead rock and roller can get the thing installed and running.

The package consists of the little box itself and some software that needs to be installed on the computer. The box will not run without the software, so if you need to plug it into a mixer you're probably out of luck. Then again, if you have a mixer then why would you need a Guitarport? Hmmm... You plug the guitar into the front of the box and the power and the USB cable in the back and voila, you're ready to jam. The Guitarbox software comes with an insane amount of effect, amp and cab models, and on my Mac I can feed the input directly into Garageband and use all the effects, etc.. built into that software as well.

How does it sound? Pretty good. I made this little sample file so you could hear me jammin' with one of the Guitarport instruments. I'm sure that after listening you will come away convinced of my status as an amateur guitarist, but in the hands of a competent musician this box could probably do some wonderful things.

jazzy.mp3

Anyways, if I come across any more holiday gift ideas I'll be sure to pass them along. In the meantime, keep readin' and rockin' and have a Hi-tech Christmas.

New Love

So I think I mentioned I got this new MacBook thingy, and I know you're wondering why a dedicated PC user like myself would even consider buying an Apple computer, so I guess the world deserves an explanation. Ah well, that's the burden I've taken on by deciding to be a responsible cyberjounalist. It's not a job, it's a calling.

Actually, buying a Mac had nothing to do with being a Microsoft hater or anything like that. I was just curious, that's all, and thought it was time I tested the waters. Now, having spent the past month and half or so with the new machine, I think I'm ready to offer a few observations. Before I start, though, I just want to make it clear that I haven't made the "switch", if you know what I mean. People get so involved in this whole PC vs Mac debate (I'm sure you've seen the commercials) that they seem to think it's gotta be one or the other. Not so, dear reader. Truth is, it's quite easy to use both, and it's all a question of the right tool for the right job. You know, "from each according to his own ability to each according to his own need" and all that.

Marxist references aside, there is a fundamental difference to the PC approach and the Mac approach, and you notice it the minute you start the machine up. Booting into Windows is like walking into the cockpit of a Boeing 747. You've got all these dials and buttons and controls to master, and although they do allow you to control this powerful machine, it feels more complex than it should when presented with such a dizzying and complex array of options. Boot the Mac, on the other hand, and it just kind of smiles at you. It says "hey there, little buddy, want to do something fun today?" You feel like it's play time, not time to get down to some serious work. The downside to that is that complexity of the PC also allows you to make your own fun, while on a Mac you're pretty much limited to playing in Apple's sandbox. I might be overgeneralizing, but it's true.

But now the question you're all asking is "Is it hard for a PC user to learn to use a Mac?", and I'd have to say that yes, it's impossibly hard and if I wasn't born with such a superior intellect and ability I never would have been able to pull it off. If you're a moron, then I'd suggest you stay with the PC.

No, no, no, I'm just kidding. In fact what you've just witnessed is a small manifestation of the dreaded "Mac effect", wherein people who use Macs seem to think themselves slightly above the uncultured, unhip and definitely uncool PC crowd. Geez, I've only had the thing since September and I'm already acting snotty.

Anyways, learning the Mac isn't hard. It takes some practice, but otherwise it's a pretty seamless transition. The other question you're probably asking is "Can I still run my Windows programs on a Mac?" Well, duuuuhhh, it's a Mac, so I guess if you want to run your Windows programs then you should probably run Windows. What do you think (you moron). However, the good news is you can actually run the Windows operating system on a Mac and, in that way, have a nifty little do-it-all machine. I use a program called Fusion by an outfit called VMWare, and there are a couple of other programs that will do the same thing, but the upshot is the same - two OS's on one machine. The downside is that you're going to have to buy a copy of Windows, and let me tell you it ain't cheap. So the answer is yes, by investing a little more money you can run Windows programs on a Mac, just be sure you haven't maxed out your credit card by buying the computer.

Those questions aside, how do I like my Mac? I love it. I confess that most of my computer time is spent on email and the internet nowadays, and for that pretty much any kind of computer - Mac or PC - will do just fine. The Mac has the added advantage of being a (so far) virus free environment, so you don't have to hassle with all the preventative measures that you need when you run a Windows machine.

Like I said I've got the MacBook, which is not the most powerful laptop in Apple's line, but it's still a mighty fast machine with a gorgeous 13 inch screen and an Intel 2.2 Ghz Core 2 Dual processor inside. It's the first white computer I've ever owned, which seemed pretty cool when I bought it until I realized that I'd have to wash my hands before using it to keep from smudging up the keys. I added an extra gig of ram to it (not Apple's ram which is hideously expensive, but regular store bought ram), and haven't run into any performance problems whatsoever.

If I had to list my dislikes I'd start with the keyboard which is not nearly as responsive as my old Toshiba Satellites was, and the speakers which are tinny and thin sounding, especially when matched up against some of the higher end Windows machines out right now. My main beef, though, would have to be ITunes. I know that Apple users everywhere love this piece of software, but unless you own an Ipod it's usefulness is pretty limited. Just another example of Apple locking you into their little world, but I sure wish there was some better Mac alternative out there that would support my Creative Zen player. I know that's probably not a big deal for most people, but it's a big deal for me. Funny how Windows will support Apple's Ipod just fine, but Apple seems to insist on bending you to it's will with their OS. Oh well, you can't have everything.

Other than that I really like most of the Mac features, particularly this thing they call Spaces. Spaces is really nothing more than a repackaging of an old computer concept called virtual desktops, which I can remember going back to a program I used to run 20 years ago called PC Tools from Central Point Software. I never used the PC Tools virtual desktops much, but I like Spaces. All Spaces does is let you run programs on different screens within the computer, so, for example, you could have your browser running on one screen and your email client running on another, and through a simple keystroke command you can switch back and forth from one screen to the other. It seems like a simple concept, but it really does a good job at reducing screen clutter. I just wish we had something like this at work.

I also like a program that ships with the Mac called Garageband which lets you set up a little home recording studio on your Mac. I'm still learning it, but so far it seems quite versatile and easy to use. I'm just waiting for Zzounds to ship me my USB guitar interface, and then I can start laying down some hot licks and editing them right there in my Mac. Who knows, maybe I'll even post something one of these days.

Anyways, it's getting late and my shoulder is starting to hurt so I'm gonna have to end this post. Turns out when I fell off my bike a couple of weeks ago I ended up tearing my left rotator cuff. Go figure, huh. I thought people tore their rotator cuffs by throwing fastballs or touchdowns or something like that, not falling of their bikes. Well, at least now I can say that Joe Montana and I have something in common besides our money and good looks. I'm sure I'll have more to say about the Mac experience in the future, so stay tuned.