One Step Up and Two Steps Back
Ah, RealNetworks. You know them, don't you? They're the company with the colorful CEO and the crappy software. Well, you think I would have learned my lesson by now but...
Today's big news was that RealNetworks has announced a major upgrade to their Rhapsody streaming music service. In case you don't know, Rhapsody is a subscription music service that streams music over the internet to your computer. It's kinda of like a big jukebox and for about 10 bucks a month you can stream as many songs as you want, but you can't download them. You can, however, purchase the songs and burn them to a CD.
That is to say, that was the Rhapsody service. With the new upgrade you can still listen to streams, but now Rhapsody has added the ability to download tracks to your computer and add them to portable MP3 players, and that includes the 800 pound gorilla of the music world the Apple IPod. At least that's what they claim. I don't have an IPod so I can't verify that.
To make the upgrade even sweeter, they have also taken a page from rival Napster and added the ability to add an unlimited amount of music to your portable device for a monthly subscription fee that is about 5 bucks over their regular subscription rate. Unfortunately, as of today there are only 2 devices which support this feature, although RealNetworks promises that they will eventually support hundreds more (including the IPod).
I'm sure that "sue-happy" Apple Computer will be agreeable to that.
Ok, so far, so good, and I should mention that I've been a Rhapsody subscriber for many years. I've always found it a good way to sample a wide variety of music without having to buy CD's and downloads. When I originally subscribed they were still owned by an outfit called Listen.com which was subsequently sold to RealNetworks, an acquistion I was sure would spell gloom and doom for Rhapsody but luckily Real seemed to be content to leave well enough alone and let Rhapsody go on pretty much as it always had.
Until today.
Now, before I get started on my rant I should probably say a word or two about RealNetworks. If you're on the internet at all then I'm sure you already know them. They're the company behind all those Real audio and video streams that seem so ubiquitous on all the major media sites around the world, and if all you do is click on an occaisional video clip that plays back using the RealPlayer software then you're probably totally unaware of Real's true mission in life. That is, to completely own your computer and all the media in it. Yes, I'll admit they've gotten a bit tamer in recent years, but Real has always had this nasty predisposition towards insinuating themselves into the deepest, darkest recesses of your computer and seizing control of all it's systems.
Which brings me to the Rhapsody upgrade. First off, let me say that the interface update was long overdue. The old one had been around for at least 3 or 4 years and was feeling a bit clunky, especially compared to it's slicker rivals. While the new interface isn't up to the standards of the current state-of-the-art in media players, it is a big improvement over what came before. I won't go into the details here, but essentially what they've done is merge the Rhapsody streaming service and the RealPlayer10 media player.
And that's the problem.
Everything was going peachy-keen until I decided to add my mp3 player to the devices list within Rhapsody. You need to do this before you can transfer music to your portable device and it's quite a common procedure these days. I've done it in Napster, I've done it in Audible, I've done it in Windows Media Player - all in all a pretty straightforward procedure. So I told Rhapsody to add the device and it dutifully informed me it would have to download some drivers to do that. Again, no problem, all the players need to do that. But, you see, I forgot. This is not any media player I'm dealing with - this is RealNetwork's media player, the company that is hell bent on dominating the world with crappy software.
Ok, this is the rant part.
Let's see, where do I begin. After I installed the drivers I plugged my device into the computer and immediately Real assumed it was time to take control of my system. Now Napster never did that, Audible never did that, but good 'ol Real, they just figured that since I installed their player that meant I would never, ever want to control how I access my device again. "Just have a seat over there, little fella', and let Real take over" is what they seemed to be saying.
So like I said, I plugged in my device and immediately 5 new windows popped up on my screen (that's right, I said 5 NEW WINDOWS! I counted 'em), and each window asked me the same question. Would you like Real to take over from here or would you like to take no action and cancel. So I clicked "Take No Action, Cancel", "Take No Action, Cancel", "Take No Action, Cancel", "Take No Action, Cancel", and "Take No Action, Cancel". Down at the bottom of each window there was also a little box which asked me if I would always like Windows to perform the same action when I connected my device, and I clicked that box too. Naively I assumed that that Windows would remember that setting and not ask me the same questions the next time I connected, butI forgot - this used to be my computer but it was Real's computer now.
After I closed all the windows I launched Windows Media Player and luckily my device showed up and everything looked fine so I let it go at that and didn't think any more of it. Of course, you know what's coming and sure enough the next time I started my computer and connected the device up come the 5 new windows again. This time I shut 'em down and went immediately into Rhapsody to try to find some way to stop these stupid windows from popping up, and lo and behold when I went into their little device area I found out that my device wasn't even listed. I had installed it, I was getting the 5 new windows, but it wasn't there. Seemed like the natural thing to do was click on the little install button and try installing it again.
Real didn't like that.
As soon as I clicked the button and I swear I heard a little voice coming from inside my computer. "Did I give you permission to press that little button? Did I? Hmmm?" Needless to say, I was spitting in the face of God and that was all she wrote.
You know there are crashes and there are freezes, and there are hard crashes and there are hard freezes, but this crash was like the Titanic hitting an iceberg. First the little progress bar starts going and gets to about 24% and then stops, then it tells me it needs to shut down Rhapsody and freezes, and then it stays frozen for about 5 minutes until finally I open up the task manager and shut it down manually, and then all of a sudden the progress bar starts moving again and asks me if I want to replace my more recent driver with this older driver that Rhapsody wants to install so of course I tell it "Hell no" and click continue, and then...well, that was not the response that Rhapsody wanted to hear.
The computer rebooted fine after I finally managed to shut it down and restart it, but plugging in my mp3 player was not a good idea. Immediately the computer started acting like it had just OD'd on seconal. It just began to run slower, and slowwwer, and slowwwwwweeeer, and slowwwwwwwwweeeeeeeerrrrr, and was running so slow, in fact, that it took about 3 minutes just to get the task manager to come up so I could shut the thing down and restart it. After the second restart I opened up Windows Media Player and this time, no device. Rhapsody had completely hosed my mp3 player.
Well, this has gone on longer than I wanted so to make a long story short let me just say that a visit to a website, and a reinstall eventually fixed the problem, but sheesh, what a pain just because I didn't want to install Real's lousy old drivers. It goes without saying that I won't be using Rhapsody to connect to my device, and who knows, maybe Real will manage to muck things up so bad that I'll be through with Rhapsody for good. I guess that's what they call "reverse engineering". Taking something that works and breaking it.
Tuesday, April 26, 2005
Monday, April 25, 2005
Pity Is For The Living, Envy Is For The Dead
"Well doc, how's it look?"
"You mean the blood test?"
"Yeah. Better or worse this time?"
"More of the same, I'd say. LDL too high, HDL too low, triglycerides off the chart. Blood pressure looks good, but you know, according to these numbers you ought to be dead by now. I don't know how you do it."
"Just stubborn, I guess."
"Been watching you're diet like I told you."
"Sure... I mean, yeah...of course."
"And the exercise."
"Well, I'm no Bruce Jenner but I do try to walk everyday."
"That's good...everyday?"
"Oh you know, this lousy weather and all. It's hard to get motivated when it's raining all the time. But yeah, most days... Some days."
"How many days?"
"I don't know. Most days, I guess."
"I don't know why you seem to think you've got all this time to take care of this problem. I mean, I can read you the numbers and tell you what you've got to do, but in the end it's up to you to take of yourself. After all, it's going to be your funeral, not mine."
(Ok, ok, here we go. I thought I was going to get through this without a lecture this time)
"You know, doc, it's hard. It's like...well suppose you told someone not to be thirsty. I mean, suppose you told them if they ever took another drink of water they were going to die an early death. Suppose you told them 'whatever you do, don't think about h0w thirsty you are. Don't think about your mouth being dry, don't think about swallowing. Just don't think about thirst.' You know what'd happen if you told someone that? Of course you do. I guarantee that all they're going to think about from that point on is how thirsty they are. No matter how hard they try, that's all they'll be thinking, and the more they try not to think about it the more of an obsession it becomes, until finally they grab a jug of water and gulp the whole thing down just so they can stop thinking about it."
"But we're not talking about a jug of water, we're talking about your chloresterol and your triglycerides and how if you don't start doing something about your diet and your exercise you'll be headed straight for some serious problems down the road."
"You know what I read today? I read that they did a study at Michigan State that found out that only 3% of the adults surveyed lead what doctors would consider a healthy lifestyle. Only 3% that didn't smoke, that ate right, that exercised daily and that kept their weight down."
"So that's you're excuse?"
"No, that's not my excuse. I'm just saying that if I'm screwing up then there are about 290 million other people in this country who are screwing up just as bad. Maybe it's not so easy being pink and healthy, you know?"
"That's a good one. I guess we should all just sit on our asses and stuff pizzas and ice cream down our throats all day. That's your solution to this problem?"
"I don't eat pizza and I don't eat ice cream and I don't sit around on my ass all day. C'mon, I'm making progress, aren't I?"
"Yeah, you're doing better than you were before, but you're not where I'd like to see you. We just need to bring these numbers down some more. But like I said, it's you're funeral."
"I feel fine doc. It's not like I'm nauseous and dizzy and coughing up blood or anything like that. I promise, I'll work on it"
"I want to see you again in a month."
"A month!?"
(Geez. Why don't I just set up a cot in the waiting room and you can come in and be my conscious every morning.)
"Yeah, and I want another blood test. We'll keep going with the same meds for now, but I want you to try to control your diet and keep going with your exercise. "
"Yeah, got it. See you next month."
(Not much of a blog, but I just want all the yunguns out there to know what they have to look forward to as they start that steady decline into decrepitude. Don't say I didn't warn you, and don't be suprised if you find yourself in a doctor's office someday having this same conversation. Just remember, you won't be young forever so...enjoy that pizza and ice cream while you can.)
"Well doc, how's it look?"
"You mean the blood test?"
"Yeah. Better or worse this time?"
"More of the same, I'd say. LDL too high, HDL too low, triglycerides off the chart. Blood pressure looks good, but you know, according to these numbers you ought to be dead by now. I don't know how you do it."
"Just stubborn, I guess."
"Been watching you're diet like I told you."
"Sure... I mean, yeah...of course."
"And the exercise."
"Well, I'm no Bruce Jenner but I do try to walk everyday."
"That's good...everyday?"
"Oh you know, this lousy weather and all. It's hard to get motivated when it's raining all the time. But yeah, most days... Some days."
"How many days?"
"I don't know. Most days, I guess."
"I don't know why you seem to think you've got all this time to take care of this problem. I mean, I can read you the numbers and tell you what you've got to do, but in the end it's up to you to take of yourself. After all, it's going to be your funeral, not mine."
(Ok, ok, here we go. I thought I was going to get through this without a lecture this time)
"You know, doc, it's hard. It's like...well suppose you told someone not to be thirsty. I mean, suppose you told them if they ever took another drink of water they were going to die an early death. Suppose you told them 'whatever you do, don't think about h0w thirsty you are. Don't think about your mouth being dry, don't think about swallowing. Just don't think about thirst.' You know what'd happen if you told someone that? Of course you do. I guarantee that all they're going to think about from that point on is how thirsty they are. No matter how hard they try, that's all they'll be thinking, and the more they try not to think about it the more of an obsession it becomes, until finally they grab a jug of water and gulp the whole thing down just so they can stop thinking about it."
"But we're not talking about a jug of water, we're talking about your chloresterol and your triglycerides and how if you don't start doing something about your diet and your exercise you'll be headed straight for some serious problems down the road."
"You know what I read today? I read that they did a study at Michigan State that found out that only 3% of the adults surveyed lead what doctors would consider a healthy lifestyle. Only 3% that didn't smoke, that ate right, that exercised daily and that kept their weight down."
"So that's you're excuse?"
"No, that's not my excuse. I'm just saying that if I'm screwing up then there are about 290 million other people in this country who are screwing up just as bad. Maybe it's not so easy being pink and healthy, you know?"
"That's a good one. I guess we should all just sit on our asses and stuff pizzas and ice cream down our throats all day. That's your solution to this problem?"
"I don't eat pizza and I don't eat ice cream and I don't sit around on my ass all day. C'mon, I'm making progress, aren't I?"
"Yeah, you're doing better than you were before, but you're not where I'd like to see you. We just need to bring these numbers down some more. But like I said, it's you're funeral."
"I feel fine doc. It's not like I'm nauseous and dizzy and coughing up blood or anything like that. I promise, I'll work on it"
"I want to see you again in a month."
"A month!?"
(Geez. Why don't I just set up a cot in the waiting room and you can come in and be my conscious every morning.)
"Yeah, and I want another blood test. We'll keep going with the same meds for now, but I want you to try to control your diet and keep going with your exercise. "
"Yeah, got it. See you next month."
(Not much of a blog, but I just want all the yunguns out there to know what they have to look forward to as they start that steady decline into decrepitude. Don't say I didn't warn you, and don't be suprised if you find yourself in a doctor's office someday having this same conversation. Just remember, you won't be young forever so...enjoy that pizza and ice cream while you can.)
Tuesday, April 19, 2005
Don't Know Much About Geometry
At one time the U.S. stood at number 3 in terms of broadband internet penetration. We then fell to number 4 and have kept on falling all the way to our current position at number 11 on the per capita broadband internet penetration list. We also lag in the average speed of our broadband connections with Japan coming in number 1 at 26 Megabits per second as compared to the U.S.'s 1.5 Megabit per second, making the average Japanese broadband connection about 17 times faster than the average U.S. broadband connection.
In other words, in the internet arena the country that has always sat at the center of the whole hi-tech revolution is slowly slipping behind the rest of the world. Not technologically backwards, of course, just failing to keep up with many of the other developed countries, particularly in Asia.
What does this all mean? Beats me.
In other news, school districts around the country are clamping down on the teaching of evolution in the classroom. While not imposing an outright evolution ban, school boards are requiring that in the name of fairness and balance, students should be told that evolution is only some poppycock atheistic heathen theory that is a slap in the face to God and religion and all the good and moral people of the world. "How can anyone that loves their mother" the students are asked "believe in this evolution crap."
Although it is only a rumor, there is also a movement underway in legislatures across America's heartland not only to prohibit the teaching of the theory of evolution, but to make evolution itself illegal as well. If successful, any species found mutating in those states with anti-evolution statutes in place will be in violation of the law and remanded to the hereafter for further judgement and reprisal. I asked the President about this.
"Good morning, Mr. President."
"Good morning Bill."
"Mr. President, there has been a great deal of movement in many state legislatures around the country to outlaw the evolution of the species. How do you feel about that and do you support these moves?"
"Well, no, um, I don't think it's, um, proper for states to act indepently on this matter. I think what we need is some action on the, er, federal level to have a national...uh, what we need is a law. A federal law, that will put these mutating species on notice, er, um...Well I'll tell you, I think they ought to go to jail."
"I notice you're using a lot of um's and er's, Mr. President, in that sort of exaggerated Texas townhall meeting style you affect whenever you're trying to sell us something. You know, like when you're talking about Social Security reform, for instance."
"The American people know that I'm, um...We're all just folks."
"I see. Then am I correct in saying that you do support the illegalization of evolution, but on a national rather than state level."
"Yes that's right. I'm not ashamed of my beliefs. As you know I believe in a faith based, uh...We can't let these species go on mutating, Bill. That's just not part of God's plan."
"Mr. President, if we do stop the evolutionary process, that is, if we do stop genetic mutations, where will that leave the country? Will we fall behind the rest of the world in terms of adaptability and resistance to disease and things like that?"
"Well you see Bill, that's a misperception that's out there among the heathen scientist community. We don't have to adapt because species don't evolve. Just the other day I was talking to Karl Rove about this and he confirmed to me that that's a view supported by a majority of the American people as well. "
"You mean, Mr. President, that Karl Rove is as highly evolved as mankind is ever going to get?"
"Yes, and the American people support me in that. I think we all want to see more scientists go to jail, and I think a federal law outlawing evolution could be a, er, first step. Go out to Kansas or Ohio or North Carolina and I think you'll see that folks agree."
"Thank you Mr. President."
"Aw, er, um...shucks."
And now just one more item from the medical file. The American Association for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery reports that there were 11.9 million cosmetic procedures performed in the United States in 2004. Leading the list were 2,837,346 botox injections, 478,251 liposuctions and 334,052 breast augmentations, an increase of 44 percent over the number of cosmetic procedures performed in 2003. Which means, of course, that although we might not be as internet connected as others and we might be turning out the lights on scientific progress, our skin is wrinkle-free and we've got lots of cleavage.
Somehow, I can't work up much outrage over that.
At one time the U.S. stood at number 3 in terms of broadband internet penetration. We then fell to number 4 and have kept on falling all the way to our current position at number 11 on the per capita broadband internet penetration list. We also lag in the average speed of our broadband connections with Japan coming in number 1 at 26 Megabits per second as compared to the U.S.'s 1.5 Megabit per second, making the average Japanese broadband connection about 17 times faster than the average U.S. broadband connection.
In other words, in the internet arena the country that has always sat at the center of the whole hi-tech revolution is slowly slipping behind the rest of the world. Not technologically backwards, of course, just failing to keep up with many of the other developed countries, particularly in Asia.
What does this all mean? Beats me.
In other news, school districts around the country are clamping down on the teaching of evolution in the classroom. While not imposing an outright evolution ban, school boards are requiring that in the name of fairness and balance, students should be told that evolution is only some poppycock atheistic heathen theory that is a slap in the face to God and religion and all the good and moral people of the world. "How can anyone that loves their mother" the students are asked "believe in this evolution crap."
Although it is only a rumor, there is also a movement underway in legislatures across America's heartland not only to prohibit the teaching of the theory of evolution, but to make evolution itself illegal as well. If successful, any species found mutating in those states with anti-evolution statutes in place will be in violation of the law and remanded to the hereafter for further judgement and reprisal. I asked the President about this.
"Good morning, Mr. President."
"Good morning Bill."
"Mr. President, there has been a great deal of movement in many state legislatures around the country to outlaw the evolution of the species. How do you feel about that and do you support these moves?"
"Well, no, um, I don't think it's, um, proper for states to act indepently on this matter. I think what we need is some action on the, er, federal level to have a national...uh, what we need is a law. A federal law, that will put these mutating species on notice, er, um...Well I'll tell you, I think they ought to go to jail."
"I notice you're using a lot of um's and er's, Mr. President, in that sort of exaggerated Texas townhall meeting style you affect whenever you're trying to sell us something. You know, like when you're talking about Social Security reform, for instance."
"The American people know that I'm, um...We're all just folks."
"I see. Then am I correct in saying that you do support the illegalization of evolution, but on a national rather than state level."
"Yes that's right. I'm not ashamed of my beliefs. As you know I believe in a faith based, uh...We can't let these species go on mutating, Bill. That's just not part of God's plan."
"Mr. President, if we do stop the evolutionary process, that is, if we do stop genetic mutations, where will that leave the country? Will we fall behind the rest of the world in terms of adaptability and resistance to disease and things like that?"
"Well you see Bill, that's a misperception that's out there among the heathen scientist community. We don't have to adapt because species don't evolve. Just the other day I was talking to Karl Rove about this and he confirmed to me that that's a view supported by a majority of the American people as well. "
"You mean, Mr. President, that Karl Rove is as highly evolved as mankind is ever going to get?"
"Yes, and the American people support me in that. I think we all want to see more scientists go to jail, and I think a federal law outlawing evolution could be a, er, first step. Go out to Kansas or Ohio or North Carolina and I think you'll see that folks agree."
"Thank you Mr. President."
"Aw, er, um...shucks."
And now just one more item from the medical file. The American Association for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery reports that there were 11.9 million cosmetic procedures performed in the United States in 2004. Leading the list were 2,837,346 botox injections, 478,251 liposuctions and 334,052 breast augmentations, an increase of 44 percent over the number of cosmetic procedures performed in 2003. Which means, of course, that although we might not be as internet connected as others and we might be turning out the lights on scientific progress, our skin is wrinkle-free and we've got lots of cleavage.
Somehow, I can't work up much outrage over that.
Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Quick Hits
Ok, I've never tried a quicke blog, so here goes.
First the technology news: ZDnet reports that Microsoft is working with OEMs to develop a Mini Tablet PC. According to the article the form factor is rumored to be bigger than a PDA but smaller than a regular-sized Tablet PC. If it's true then we may finally see the type of device I have long been looking for, with enough screen size to make web surfing and other common tasks actually doable on a portable device, but still small and light enough to easily carry around the house or on a trip. No details were announced but if they can fit a keyboard on it (a slider maybe?) and deliver respectable battery life then count me in.
Technolgy news part 2: Oops, looks like Lexis-Nexis might have kind of accidently leaked personal data on about 310,000 consumers, sort of. Well, what can you say really. It's only our social security numbers and bank account numbers and credit card numbers, etc... Is that such a big deal? The part I like about this whole mess is that the credit bureaus tell us that if our information has been compromised we can put a freeze on our credit reports. This means that no one can open a new credit card or take out a new loan in our name without our authorization. Oh, and by the way, if we do want to give our authorization to open a new account then there will be $10.00 charge for each new account opened. What a deal! Some information broker screws up and we're the ones that have to pay the credit bureaus to keep our records secure. In the business world that 's what they call "having you by the balls."
Financial News: Stocks finished sharply lower today on news that American's aren't buying enough stuff. So America I begging you, I'm pleading with you, I'm down on my news. Please, please go out and buy more stuff, will ya'. My retirement is depending on it.
State News: Dear friends, as we gather here today to remember the once promising career of Governor Arnold let us take a moment to consider the notion of hubris, and let us also consider knowing how and when to pick your fights. As it becomes clear that the governership of Arnold Schwarzenegger is now effectively dead in the water, and as it is only right that we give the democrats a few moments to gather 'round his grave and begin their victory dance, let us further reflect on just what it is that they have won. The budget is stil a mess, more bonds will be issued to get us through the next fiscal year, and the power brokers that were pulling the strings yesterday will still be pulling the strings tomorrow. We bid you farewell, Arnold, and give thanks to the status quo.
Local News: Dateline San Jose, California 10 April 2005. The Cheerleaders of San Jose State have been suspended by the University after performing a routine at a basketball game that one elderly fan described as "vulgar" and a "burlesque, with bumps and grinds." The suspension comes amid a recent flurry of complaints about the general moral decline of our country and its institutions. "Whatever happened to wholesomeness" one man complained. "Why I've got a daughter myself and I can tell you I'd never allow her to go around flaunting herself like that, dancing in public and making herself up to be sexually attractive. God only knows what's going through the minds of those men." Asked to comment his daughter added "But Dad, I'm 37 years old." Reminded that audiences once considered the dancing of Elvis Presley obscene only later to see it as a no more than a tempest in a teapot, the man replied "No daugther of mine. No sir, no daughter of mine." The University will decide later this year on further guidelines and the future of the cheerleading program. Meanwhile I'm just sitting here kicking myself and asking how I could have been so foolish as to miss that game.
Ok, I've never tried a quicke blog, so here goes.
First the technology news: ZDnet reports that Microsoft is working with OEMs to develop a Mini Tablet PC. According to the article the form factor is rumored to be bigger than a PDA but smaller than a regular-sized Tablet PC. If it's true then we may finally see the type of device I have long been looking for, with enough screen size to make web surfing and other common tasks actually doable on a portable device, but still small and light enough to easily carry around the house or on a trip. No details were announced but if they can fit a keyboard on it (a slider maybe?) and deliver respectable battery life then count me in.
Technolgy news part 2: Oops, looks like Lexis-Nexis might have kind of accidently leaked personal data on about 310,000 consumers, sort of. Well, what can you say really. It's only our social security numbers and bank account numbers and credit card numbers, etc... Is that such a big deal? The part I like about this whole mess is that the credit bureaus tell us that if our information has been compromised we can put a freeze on our credit reports. This means that no one can open a new credit card or take out a new loan in our name without our authorization. Oh, and by the way, if we do want to give our authorization to open a new account then there will be $10.00 charge for each new account opened. What a deal! Some information broker screws up and we're the ones that have to pay the credit bureaus to keep our records secure. In the business world that 's what they call "having you by the balls."
Financial News: Stocks finished sharply lower today on news that American's aren't buying enough stuff. So America I begging you, I'm pleading with you, I'm down on my news. Please, please go out and buy more stuff, will ya'. My retirement is depending on it.
State News: Dear friends, as we gather here today to remember the once promising career of Governor Arnold let us take a moment to consider the notion of hubris, and let us also consider knowing how and when to pick your fights. As it becomes clear that the governership of Arnold Schwarzenegger is now effectively dead in the water, and as it is only right that we give the democrats a few moments to gather 'round his grave and begin their victory dance, let us further reflect on just what it is that they have won. The budget is stil a mess, more bonds will be issued to get us through the next fiscal year, and the power brokers that were pulling the strings yesterday will still be pulling the strings tomorrow. We bid you farewell, Arnold, and give thanks to the status quo.
Local News: Dateline San Jose, California 10 April 2005. The Cheerleaders of San Jose State have been suspended by the University after performing a routine at a basketball game that one elderly fan described as "vulgar" and a "burlesque, with bumps and grinds." The suspension comes amid a recent flurry of complaints about the general moral decline of our country and its institutions. "Whatever happened to wholesomeness" one man complained. "Why I've got a daughter myself and I can tell you I'd never allow her to go around flaunting herself like that, dancing in public and making herself up to be sexually attractive. God only knows what's going through the minds of those men." Asked to comment his daughter added "But Dad, I'm 37 years old." Reminded that audiences once considered the dancing of Elvis Presley obscene only later to see it as a no more than a tempest in a teapot, the man replied "No daugther of mine. No sir, no daughter of mine." The University will decide later this year on further guidelines and the future of the cheerleading program. Meanwhile I'm just sitting here kicking myself and asking how I could have been so foolish as to miss that game.
Monday, April 11, 2005
Do They Have Cable TV In Heaven?
I was driving past the gas station today and the one sign said "Regular Unleaded $264.9" and the sign next to it said "Cigarettes $2.59 pk". Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't it strange that heart and lung disease now costs less in California than a gallon of gas. Seemed strange to me, and the next time someone comes up to me and says "life is cheap" I can tell them "No you're wrong. Death is actually a nickel cheaper."
Being the financially prudent type myself, I chewed on this awhile and came to the conclusion that budgetarily speaking it wouldn't be such a bad idea to sell my car and start smoking cigarettes. After all, a penny saved is a penny earned you know, but then events which have been so prominent in the news lately made that plan seem less worthy - or should I say stupid. So rather than surrender to my prudent, rational self I decided to give in to my more spendthrift, irrational self and go out and buy a new DVD player instead. Granted, this has no express relationship to either cigarettes or the price of gasoline, but does show that a person has to break the mold every now and then and doing something foolish, if only to avoid being ambushed by the corruptive influences of too much good sense.
So, I took this uncashed gift card I got last christmas and went down to the local electronics superstore, fiercely determined that come hell or high water I was going to be rid of it and find something to spend it on. The computer stuff didn't interest me, nor did the cameras and telephones and movies, etc..., but I did have this 6 or 7 year old DVD player at home and figured I could use something newer that would play movies and mp3's and jpeg's and all those formats that were hopelessly beyond my old antique. And while I was at it, I figured, why not get one of those new ones that can record DVD's as well as play them. That way I could back up some of those movies and TV shows I had on my TIVO and put them away for safekeeping.
And so I walked into the store with a gift card and walked out with a new DVD player/recorder.
That's what I'm going to blog on tonight - my new Toshiba D-VR4SU Hi-Fi VCR & DVD Video Recorder. First let me say there were cheaper recorders available and some well under the $200.00 I paid out of pocket after cashing in my gift card, but I've always had good luck with Toshiba in the past and so that's the one I got. Anyways, who cares why I bought this particular model - let me just pass on my experiences to others who might be considering buying one for themselves.
My experiences:
Let me begin by saying it works just fine, and by that I don't mean it worked fine the first time I tried to use it, only that after some trial and error I finally figured out how to get the thing set up and working the way I want it to. The unit ships with a remote, some batteries, an RCA cable and a coaxial cable for those still getting their TV over an antenna. The unit also has connections for S-Video, Component Video and Digital Audio (both coax and optical), but cables for those connections are not included. As an added bonus they also bundle in some extra packing paper in the form of something jokingly referred to as the "Owners Manual". My advice is that after unpacking the unit, immediately throw the "Owners Manual" in the nearest trashcan. I guarantee this will save you hours of confusion and frustration.
Being the naive type, I didn't throw away the manual and after following the instructions for hooking up my satellite box (or cable box as referred to in the manual - same difference), I happily spent the next hour or so checking cables, connections and settings and trying to figure out why I wasn't getting any picture. The manual kept saying to tune the tuner on the DVD recorder to channels 3 and 4 and you should be able to see your TV signal, but all I was getting was a big, blue, empty screen full of nothing. Finally I started playing around with all the settings and drilling down through all the setup menus and discovered a spot on the DVD tuner called "Line Input". I changed the channel to Line Input and presto - I finally got my picture. I then went back through the manual and I swear to you "Line Input" is not mentioned anywhere. Typical, I guess.
So now I had the picture coming from my TIVO piped through my DVD Recorder and it was time to burn a disc. This was remarkably easy and anyone who has ever taped anything with a VCR would have no problems with it. In fact, it's exactly the same with both one-touch recording and timer recording available. Just put a blank DVD-R or DVD-RW in the machine, start the recording and that's it. I should mention that this model will also record to DVD-RAM but since most DVD players and computers can't read DVD-RAM discs I don't know why you would want to use it. Still, it's available.
After the recording is done the last step is to "close" or "finalize" the disk. This is only necessary if you want to take the recorded DVD and play it in some other machine. I'm guessing you probably do, so you will need to enter a setup menu, drill down a couple of levels and tell the machine to "finalize" the disc. Once this is done you have yourself a nice little DVD that you can st0re away or give to a friend or whatever.
At least that's the theory.
In actual use there can be problems. The one I ran into on the my first burn attempt was this thing called "title editing". I don't want to go into great detail here but let me just summarize and say that before finalizing the disc you have the option of editing the titles of the videos contained on the disc. By default the machine names them by date and time (I think), but if you want to give the videos a more descriptive names you can. This seemed pretty cool to me so after my first burn I tried changing the title to the name of the TV show I recorded. It went smoothly enough but after I finalized the disc and tried to play it on my computer it spit it right back in my face with an "unrecognized format" error. This was not what I expected and when I explored the disc I found that VOB file containing the actual video played just fine, but the VOB containing the title was hopelessly mangled. Moral of the story - don't mess with title editing unless you've got some spare blanks and feel like experimenting. I just leave the titles alone and have had nothing but clean burns since. The DVD's play on all of my computers and on my housemate's DVD player as well.
The only other problem I've had with the DVD portion of this unit is that it gets confused a lot between the different types of discs I throw at it. In fact the "C104 - Disc cannot be recognized" error is pretty common and it usually takes more than one process of opening and closing the DVD tray to get it to correctly identify the disc, whether it is a commerical DVD, a DVD-R, a DVD-RW, and so on. Sometimes even opening and closing the tray doesn't work and I've had to shut off the unit completely and restart it before it would recognize the disc. It's very annoying, but once the disc is recognized I've never had any problems playing or recording.
The VCR portion of the machine works as expected and it's nice being able to replace both DVD player and VCR with just one machine. Like most combo VCR/DVD Recorder units the Toshiba can also dub from Tape to DVD and vice-versa, but I haven't actually dubbed a tape yet so I can't comment on that. I can tell you that it won't dub commercial VHS tapes to DVD though, because I did try that and it didn't work. The tape I tried to dub is an old Cranberries Concert video that has apparently been Macrovisioned, and when I tried to dub it the machine immediately stopped and gave me a "CR254 - Naughty, naughty, naughty" error, or something like that. It's unfortunate, but understandable. Just forget about dubbing anything copy protected and you should be fine for everything else.
So that's my little Toshiba D-VR4SU consumer review. The manual stinks but the machine works as advertised. It records DVD-R, DVD-RW, DVD-RAM and VHS tapes, and plays DVD's, VHS tapes, CD's, CD-R's, CD-RW's, VCD's, and SVCD's. Iit's nice being able to move stuff off of my TIVO and onto DVD where I can put it in permanent storage or manipulate it into other formats, and although there are some minor problems with the unit, overall I'm pretty pleased.
Of course there are other methods available for recording video and I've considered them, but having a dedicated DVD Recorder works if you don't have a computer in your living room or don't want to run a bunch of cables back and forth. A hard drive inside the unit would be nice but s0 far the hard drive DVD Recorder's are over my budget. Besides, I have a TIVO so a hard drive would be a little redundant.
Anyways, the prices are coming down and people looking to replace their DVD players might want to consider getting a recorder. I know I heard the horror stories when they first came out but they seem to be getting the bugs worked out, and even though Blu-Ray and HD-DVD are coming these current Recorders are still inexpensive enough to be a good interim solution.
I was driving past the gas station today and the one sign said "Regular Unleaded $264.9" and the sign next to it said "Cigarettes $2.59 pk". Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't it strange that heart and lung disease now costs less in California than a gallon of gas. Seemed strange to me, and the next time someone comes up to me and says "life is cheap" I can tell them "No you're wrong. Death is actually a nickel cheaper."
Being the financially prudent type myself, I chewed on this awhile and came to the conclusion that budgetarily speaking it wouldn't be such a bad idea to sell my car and start smoking cigarettes. After all, a penny saved is a penny earned you know, but then events which have been so prominent in the news lately made that plan seem less worthy - or should I say stupid. So rather than surrender to my prudent, rational self I decided to give in to my more spendthrift, irrational self and go out and buy a new DVD player instead. Granted, this has no express relationship to either cigarettes or the price of gasoline, but does show that a person has to break the mold every now and then and doing something foolish, if only to avoid being ambushed by the corruptive influences of too much good sense.
So, I took this uncashed gift card I got last christmas and went down to the local electronics superstore, fiercely determined that come hell or high water I was going to be rid of it and find something to spend it on. The computer stuff didn't interest me, nor did the cameras and telephones and movies, etc..., but I did have this 6 or 7 year old DVD player at home and figured I could use something newer that would play movies and mp3's and jpeg's and all those formats that were hopelessly beyond my old antique. And while I was at it, I figured, why not get one of those new ones that can record DVD's as well as play them. That way I could back up some of those movies and TV shows I had on my TIVO and put them away for safekeeping.
And so I walked into the store with a gift card and walked out with a new DVD player/recorder.
That's what I'm going to blog on tonight - my new Toshiba D-VR4SU Hi-Fi VCR & DVD Video Recorder. First let me say there were cheaper recorders available and some well under the $200.00 I paid out of pocket after cashing in my gift card, but I've always had good luck with Toshiba in the past and so that's the one I got. Anyways, who cares why I bought this particular model - let me just pass on my experiences to others who might be considering buying one for themselves.
My experiences:
Let me begin by saying it works just fine, and by that I don't mean it worked fine the first time I tried to use it, only that after some trial and error I finally figured out how to get the thing set up and working the way I want it to. The unit ships with a remote, some batteries, an RCA cable and a coaxial cable for those still getting their TV over an antenna. The unit also has connections for S-Video, Component Video and Digital Audio (both coax and optical), but cables for those connections are not included. As an added bonus they also bundle in some extra packing paper in the form of something jokingly referred to as the "Owners Manual". My advice is that after unpacking the unit, immediately throw the "Owners Manual" in the nearest trashcan. I guarantee this will save you hours of confusion and frustration.
Being the naive type, I didn't throw away the manual and after following the instructions for hooking up my satellite box (or cable box as referred to in the manual - same difference), I happily spent the next hour or so checking cables, connections and settings and trying to figure out why I wasn't getting any picture. The manual kept saying to tune the tuner on the DVD recorder to channels 3 and 4 and you should be able to see your TV signal, but all I was getting was a big, blue, empty screen full of nothing. Finally I started playing around with all the settings and drilling down through all the setup menus and discovered a spot on the DVD tuner called "Line Input". I changed the channel to Line Input and presto - I finally got my picture. I then went back through the manual and I swear to you "Line Input" is not mentioned anywhere. Typical, I guess.
So now I had the picture coming from my TIVO piped through my DVD Recorder and it was time to burn a disc. This was remarkably easy and anyone who has ever taped anything with a VCR would have no problems with it. In fact, it's exactly the same with both one-touch recording and timer recording available. Just put a blank DVD-R or DVD-RW in the machine, start the recording and that's it. I should mention that this model will also record to DVD-RAM but since most DVD players and computers can't read DVD-RAM discs I don't know why you would want to use it. Still, it's available.
After the recording is done the last step is to "close" or "finalize" the disk. This is only necessary if you want to take the recorded DVD and play it in some other machine. I'm guessing you probably do, so you will need to enter a setup menu, drill down a couple of levels and tell the machine to "finalize" the disc. Once this is done you have yourself a nice little DVD that you can st0re away or give to a friend or whatever.
At least that's the theory.
In actual use there can be problems. The one I ran into on the my first burn attempt was this thing called "title editing". I don't want to go into great detail here but let me just summarize and say that before finalizing the disc you have the option of editing the titles of the videos contained on the disc. By default the machine names them by date and time (I think), but if you want to give the videos a more descriptive names you can. This seemed pretty cool to me so after my first burn I tried changing the title to the name of the TV show I recorded. It went smoothly enough but after I finalized the disc and tried to play it on my computer it spit it right back in my face with an "unrecognized format" error. This was not what I expected and when I explored the disc I found that VOB file containing the actual video played just fine, but the VOB containing the title was hopelessly mangled. Moral of the story - don't mess with title editing unless you've got some spare blanks and feel like experimenting. I just leave the titles alone and have had nothing but clean burns since. The DVD's play on all of my computers and on my housemate's DVD player as well.
The only other problem I've had with the DVD portion of this unit is that it gets confused a lot between the different types of discs I throw at it. In fact the "C104 - Disc cannot be recognized" error is pretty common and it usually takes more than one process of opening and closing the DVD tray to get it to correctly identify the disc, whether it is a commerical DVD, a DVD-R, a DVD-RW, and so on. Sometimes even opening and closing the tray doesn't work and I've had to shut off the unit completely and restart it before it would recognize the disc. It's very annoying, but once the disc is recognized I've never had any problems playing or recording.
The VCR portion of the machine works as expected and it's nice being able to replace both DVD player and VCR with just one machine. Like most combo VCR/DVD Recorder units the Toshiba can also dub from Tape to DVD and vice-versa, but I haven't actually dubbed a tape yet so I can't comment on that. I can tell you that it won't dub commercial VHS tapes to DVD though, because I did try that and it didn't work. The tape I tried to dub is an old Cranberries Concert video that has apparently been Macrovisioned, and when I tried to dub it the machine immediately stopped and gave me a "CR254 - Naughty, naughty, naughty" error, or something like that. It's unfortunate, but understandable. Just forget about dubbing anything copy protected and you should be fine for everything else.
So that's my little Toshiba D-VR4SU consumer review. The manual stinks but the machine works as advertised. It records DVD-R, DVD-RW, DVD-RAM and VHS tapes, and plays DVD's, VHS tapes, CD's, CD-R's, CD-RW's, VCD's, and SVCD's. Iit's nice being able to move stuff off of my TIVO and onto DVD where I can put it in permanent storage or manipulate it into other formats, and although there are some minor problems with the unit, overall I'm pretty pleased.
Of course there are other methods available for recording video and I've considered them, but having a dedicated DVD Recorder works if you don't have a computer in your living room or don't want to run a bunch of cables back and forth. A hard drive inside the unit would be nice but s0 far the hard drive DVD Recorder's are over my budget. Besides, I have a TIVO so a hard drive would be a little redundant.
Anyways, the prices are coming down and people looking to replace their DVD players might want to consider getting a recorder. I know I heard the horror stories when they first came out but they seem to be getting the bugs worked out, and even though Blu-Ray and HD-DVD are coming these current Recorders are still inexpensive enough to be a good interim solution.
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
Verdi, Verdi, Verdi, Verdi, Verdi
"I wish I was into jazz."
"What are you talking about?"
"I mean people who are into jazz are cool, you know."
"Says who?"
"Says me, that's who. C'mon man, admit it. Jazz is just so cool."
"I like opera, and the classics."
"Well so do I but face it - opera ain't cool. In fact, it's like 180 degrees from cool, man. It's like cool times a negative one, you know what I'm saying?"
"Yeah, well so what. I still like opera and I don't care how cool it is or not. Besides, jazz ain't cool - rap is cool. Hip-hop is cool. Jazz is like, well, who listens to jazz anyways?"
"No, man, hip-hop isn't cool. Hip-hop is hip, but it ain't cool."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"Hip-hop is the mainstream, man. That makes it hip, but it don't make it cool. If you want to be cool you got be out there on the fringes, you know, off the radar."
"Dude, what you been smoking? Hip-hop is mainstream, and it's cool. The clothes are cool, the talk is cool...it's just cool, ok. "
"Naw, it ain't. I'm telling 'ya. Jazz is cool. Hip-hop is the culture, it's what everyone is into. You can't be cool if your just doing the same thing everyone else is. But jazz... I mean, no one listens to jazz. That what makes it so cool."
"Now you're just being stupid. No one listens to opera either and that don't make it cool."
"Yeah, but people who listen to hip-hop and rock and all that stuff - they know deep down in their hearts that if they was really cool then they'd be listening to jazz. I mean, they know that if they was sophisticated and cultured and had lot's of women then they'd be into jazz too. It's like deep down they know that's something they should aspire to even if they don't like the music or understand it. But no one who listens to rock aspires to listen to the opera. Not unless they want to be a nerd."
"Yeah, ok, I get your point, but I still say that jazz don't make you cool. I mean you used to listen to jazz and that never made you cool, did it? Damn, besides, the only people who listen to jazz are college professors and black intellectuals and they don't seem very cool to me."
"Yeah, I used to listen to jazz but it didn't take me very far. Oh man, 'The Black Saint and the Sinner Lady'. Did you ever listen to that record? I swear, that was just too good to be jazz. If there was more like that I would have listened longer, but a lot of the jazz I heard just sounded like new opinions on the same old topics. It was still cool though."
"Whatever. You know what jazz don't have though? It don't have sex and violence, that's what. I mean, just go to the movies and turn on the TV and it's like the whole world is crazy for sex and violence. That's why people like the hip-hop and the rock, and that's what makes opera cooler than jazz. Opera's full of sex and violence. People want that. That's why people don't like jazz, it's TOO cool, man. People want a little heat with their music, you know what I mean."
"Now who's being stupid. Jazz is nothing but sex, man. Damn, people go to bars and get drunk when they listen to jazz. There's all kinds of drugs and violence and jealous lovers hanging around those kinds of places, man. That's why it's so cool. They aren't looking at sex and violence on some movie screen or on some stage - they're living it, man. When's the last time you saw a bar fight break out at the opera house."
"That's bull, man. That's just plain bull. You mean to tell me that when McCoy Tyner is up there playing and stuff that the people in the audience are out there murdering and fornicating and getting into bar fights? Right. I'd like to see that."
"Ok, ok, but still you know as well as I do that sex and violence at the opera ain't the same as it is in the movies or on TV."
"Sure it is."
"Bull. You been to any movies lately? When people die in the movies they show everything, man, and I mean everything. You get to see the flesh explode and blood flying and the brains and stuff all falling out. Man, you go the opera and some guy dies and all he does is lay down on the ground and start singing an aria or something. It's so phony, man. Nothing like it is in the movies."
"Well people at the opera don't want to see the tenors brains start falling out if that's what you mean. That don't mean that the opera can't be just as depraved as the movies, does it? Hell, what about Rigoletto? That's pretty depraved, isn't it? I mean you got kidnapping and rape and assassination and murder for hire and a deformed old hunchback and filicide and..."
"Naw, it wasn't actually filicide. Still, Rigoletto's pretty depraved. "
"Yeah, wouldn't that be like the perfect opera to go to for your first opera? Especially for a teenager. I mean teenagers are into that nihilism and death and maiming and stuff. They'd probably dig opera if it was really depraved like Rigoletto."
"Especially if they could modernize it, you know. Make the Duke a drug lord and make Sparafucile and ex-CIA agent who turned bad or something. Then at the end when Rigoletto opens the sack maybe you could have Gilda's guts spill out all over the stage..."
"You really got this thing for seeing peoples guts hanging out, don't you?"
"Naw, I just mean they should modernize it. You know how they're always talking about how they should try to introduce opera to younger audiences, well, you know, you gotta change with the times if you want to keep the kids interested."
"You mean if you want to be cool."
"Yeah, if you want to be cool."
"Then you're saying that opera is cool?"
"No, I'm saying opera is depraved. Jazz is cool."
"I wish I was into jazz."
"What are you talking about?"
"I mean people who are into jazz are cool, you know."
"Says who?"
"Says me, that's who. C'mon man, admit it. Jazz is just so cool."
"I like opera, and the classics."
"Well so do I but face it - opera ain't cool. In fact, it's like 180 degrees from cool, man. It's like cool times a negative one, you know what I'm saying?"
"Yeah, well so what. I still like opera and I don't care how cool it is or not. Besides, jazz ain't cool - rap is cool. Hip-hop is cool. Jazz is like, well, who listens to jazz anyways?"
"No, man, hip-hop isn't cool. Hip-hop is hip, but it ain't cool."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"Hip-hop is the mainstream, man. That makes it hip, but it don't make it cool. If you want to be cool you got be out there on the fringes, you know, off the radar."
"Dude, what you been smoking? Hip-hop is mainstream, and it's cool. The clothes are cool, the talk is cool...it's just cool, ok. "
"Naw, it ain't. I'm telling 'ya. Jazz is cool. Hip-hop is the culture, it's what everyone is into. You can't be cool if your just doing the same thing everyone else is. But jazz... I mean, no one listens to jazz. That what makes it so cool."
"Now you're just being stupid. No one listens to opera either and that don't make it cool."
"Yeah, but people who listen to hip-hop and rock and all that stuff - they know deep down in their hearts that if they was really cool then they'd be listening to jazz. I mean, they know that if they was sophisticated and cultured and had lot's of women then they'd be into jazz too. It's like deep down they know that's something they should aspire to even if they don't like the music or understand it. But no one who listens to rock aspires to listen to the opera. Not unless they want to be a nerd."
"Yeah, ok, I get your point, but I still say that jazz don't make you cool. I mean you used to listen to jazz and that never made you cool, did it? Damn, besides, the only people who listen to jazz are college professors and black intellectuals and they don't seem very cool to me."
"Yeah, I used to listen to jazz but it didn't take me very far. Oh man, 'The Black Saint and the Sinner Lady'. Did you ever listen to that record? I swear, that was just too good to be jazz. If there was more like that I would have listened longer, but a lot of the jazz I heard just sounded like new opinions on the same old topics. It was still cool though."
"Whatever. You know what jazz don't have though? It don't have sex and violence, that's what. I mean, just go to the movies and turn on the TV and it's like the whole world is crazy for sex and violence. That's why people like the hip-hop and the rock, and that's what makes opera cooler than jazz. Opera's full of sex and violence. People want that. That's why people don't like jazz, it's TOO cool, man. People want a little heat with their music, you know what I mean."
"Now who's being stupid. Jazz is nothing but sex, man. Damn, people go to bars and get drunk when they listen to jazz. There's all kinds of drugs and violence and jealous lovers hanging around those kinds of places, man. That's why it's so cool. They aren't looking at sex and violence on some movie screen or on some stage - they're living it, man. When's the last time you saw a bar fight break out at the opera house."
"That's bull, man. That's just plain bull. You mean to tell me that when McCoy Tyner is up there playing and stuff that the people in the audience are out there murdering and fornicating and getting into bar fights? Right. I'd like to see that."
"Ok, ok, but still you know as well as I do that sex and violence at the opera ain't the same as it is in the movies or on TV."
"Sure it is."
"Bull. You been to any movies lately? When people die in the movies they show everything, man, and I mean everything. You get to see the flesh explode and blood flying and the brains and stuff all falling out. Man, you go the opera and some guy dies and all he does is lay down on the ground and start singing an aria or something. It's so phony, man. Nothing like it is in the movies."
"Well people at the opera don't want to see the tenors brains start falling out if that's what you mean. That don't mean that the opera can't be just as depraved as the movies, does it? Hell, what about Rigoletto? That's pretty depraved, isn't it? I mean you got kidnapping and rape and assassination and murder for hire and a deformed old hunchback and filicide and..."
"Naw, it wasn't actually filicide. Still, Rigoletto's pretty depraved. "
"Yeah, wouldn't that be like the perfect opera to go to for your first opera? Especially for a teenager. I mean teenagers are into that nihilism and death and maiming and stuff. They'd probably dig opera if it was really depraved like Rigoletto."
"Especially if they could modernize it, you know. Make the Duke a drug lord and make Sparafucile and ex-CIA agent who turned bad or something. Then at the end when Rigoletto opens the sack maybe you could have Gilda's guts spill out all over the stage..."
"You really got this thing for seeing peoples guts hanging out, don't you?"
"Naw, I just mean they should modernize it. You know how they're always talking about how they should try to introduce opera to younger audiences, well, you know, you gotta change with the times if you want to keep the kids interested."
"You mean if you want to be cool."
"Yeah, if you want to be cool."
"Then you're saying that opera is cool?"
"No, I'm saying opera is depraved. Jazz is cool."
Tuesday, April 05, 2005
Cut And Paste (In The Key of G)
Now, more than ever, what the top-selling pop artist needs is looks. Sure, attractiveness has always been part of the equation, but with the growing dominance of the producer and sound engineer these days it seems like even the merest of talents can make it to the top if they're good looking enough and have the right kind of studio talent. I say that from the perspective of a listener not an insider, of course, but just look at the CD covers and listen to the music and tell me I'm wrong. It's abundantly clear that technology has finally completed it's triumph over art, and to prove my point all you have to do is look at the mashup.
Have you heard these things? They've been around for a while and just seem to be getting more and more popular every day, though lord knows why. Let me backup a bit. For all of you non-hipsters out there I should probably explain that a mashup is just this thing you get when a person takes different songs or pieces of songs or pieces or whatever and meshes them together into a sort of hybrid noise strung together with a loud, pulsing electronic beat. They're quite common on the internet and in podcasts and the beauty of the mashup is that you don't need an artist to create one - all you need is technology. Well, no, the engineers and technologists on the internet call them art, but I have my doubts.
To tell the truth, mashups remind me of those collages we used to make in junior high art class. If you remember, the collage was a wonderful thing because even the most hamhanded artistic wannabes, the supremely ungifted who couldn't draw a line or make the simplest gumby-like clay sculpture, could nevertheless make a collage. All you had to do was cut some pictures and things out of a magazine and paste them onto a piece of posterboard and voila- instant Rauschenberg!
That's the idea behind the mashup, anyways, and though there are technical skills involved, I can't bring myself to call it art. A folk art, maybe, like quilting, but not "art" art. Ok, maybe I'm just being condescending here. There is certainly nothing wrong with quilting or mashups and they certainly take more skill to produce than I have, and if millions of people enjoy them then more power to them. Still...
Maybe I should backup a bit. The only reason I'm even talking about this is because of an old Dan Hicks record I was listening to today. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know what you're thinking. The old man's getting nostalgic on us. He's reminiscing about the good 'ol days and how they don't make 'em like they used to, blah, blah, blah.
Yeah, so maybe I am.
That's what happens to you when you get older, you know. Somewhere along the line you pass a tipping point and the simple truths of the past start looking more attractive to you than the false hopes for the future. I don't know where the exact meridian is, but I'm sure has something to do with experience and the knowledge that far too often the gains aren't worth the losses. You'll get old someday and understand what I mean.
Anyways, I was listening to Dan Hicks and it just occured to me that this is something you'll never hear again; a popular music built on acoustic instruments, simple harmonies, tight musicianship and execution. Nope, you'll never hear the likes of that again. Technology has taken over, almost like it has become the antonym of art.
Which brings me to what I really want to talk about.
The difference between art and technology, you see, is a lot like the difference between fiction and nonfiction. Nonfiction gives you the facts and the details, and yet can be strangely ambiguous or inconclusive as to the actual truth. In most cases, I've found that fiction actually comes closer to the real, universal truths than nonfiction does. To know the facts you need the journalist or documentarian; to know the truth you need the imagery and imagination of the novelist or poet.
That's why I've always thought that computers (strictly nonfiction machines) have such a terrible time of showing any real intelligence. I mean, to perform even the simplest task a computer requires endless detail and instruction, each step carefully laid out, each contigency anticipated and responded to. Vary from the program even a little and the computer is lost. Why? Because it has no imagination. It only has the tools and materials it was given and it's list of appointed tasks.
So what is missing from the mashup? It's simple. The creative concept. Imagination. Truth.
But then, those are old-fashioned things, aren't they. All we ask for in these modern times are consumables, not truths. Technology we can buy to occupy our time and keep the silence and the boredom away. Ahhh, these modern times. I wonder if Beethoven were alive today if he would be composing or just sitting at a mixing board doing mashups?
Yeah I know - he'd be doing mashups.
Let's just be grateful he isn't alive today.
Now, more than ever, what the top-selling pop artist needs is looks. Sure, attractiveness has always been part of the equation, but with the growing dominance of the producer and sound engineer these days it seems like even the merest of talents can make it to the top if they're good looking enough and have the right kind of studio talent. I say that from the perspective of a listener not an insider, of course, but just look at the CD covers and listen to the music and tell me I'm wrong. It's abundantly clear that technology has finally completed it's triumph over art, and to prove my point all you have to do is look at the mashup.
Have you heard these things? They've been around for a while and just seem to be getting more and more popular every day, though lord knows why. Let me backup a bit. For all of you non-hipsters out there I should probably explain that a mashup is just this thing you get when a person takes different songs or pieces of songs or pieces or whatever and meshes them together into a sort of hybrid noise strung together with a loud, pulsing electronic beat. They're quite common on the internet and in podcasts and the beauty of the mashup is that you don't need an artist to create one - all you need is technology. Well, no, the engineers and technologists on the internet call them art, but I have my doubts.
To tell the truth, mashups remind me of those collages we used to make in junior high art class. If you remember, the collage was a wonderful thing because even the most hamhanded artistic wannabes, the supremely ungifted who couldn't draw a line or make the simplest gumby-like clay sculpture, could nevertheless make a collage. All you had to do was cut some pictures and things out of a magazine and paste them onto a piece of posterboard and voila- instant Rauschenberg!
That's the idea behind the mashup, anyways, and though there are technical skills involved, I can't bring myself to call it art. A folk art, maybe, like quilting, but not "art" art. Ok, maybe I'm just being condescending here. There is certainly nothing wrong with quilting or mashups and they certainly take more skill to produce than I have, and if millions of people enjoy them then more power to them. Still...
Maybe I should backup a bit. The only reason I'm even talking about this is because of an old Dan Hicks record I was listening to today. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know what you're thinking. The old man's getting nostalgic on us. He's reminiscing about the good 'ol days and how they don't make 'em like they used to, blah, blah, blah.
Yeah, so maybe I am.
That's what happens to you when you get older, you know. Somewhere along the line you pass a tipping point and the simple truths of the past start looking more attractive to you than the false hopes for the future. I don't know where the exact meridian is, but I'm sure has something to do with experience and the knowledge that far too often the gains aren't worth the losses. You'll get old someday and understand what I mean.
Anyways, I was listening to Dan Hicks and it just occured to me that this is something you'll never hear again; a popular music built on acoustic instruments, simple harmonies, tight musicianship and execution. Nope, you'll never hear the likes of that again. Technology has taken over, almost like it has become the antonym of art.
Which brings me to what I really want to talk about.
The difference between art and technology, you see, is a lot like the difference between fiction and nonfiction. Nonfiction gives you the facts and the details, and yet can be strangely ambiguous or inconclusive as to the actual truth. In most cases, I've found that fiction actually comes closer to the real, universal truths than nonfiction does. To know the facts you need the journalist or documentarian; to know the truth you need the imagery and imagination of the novelist or poet.
That's why I've always thought that computers (strictly nonfiction machines) have such a terrible time of showing any real intelligence. I mean, to perform even the simplest task a computer requires endless detail and instruction, each step carefully laid out, each contigency anticipated and responded to. Vary from the program even a little and the computer is lost. Why? Because it has no imagination. It only has the tools and materials it was given and it's list of appointed tasks.
So what is missing from the mashup? It's simple. The creative concept. Imagination. Truth.
But then, those are old-fashioned things, aren't they. All we ask for in these modern times are consumables, not truths. Technology we can buy to occupy our time and keep the silence and the boredom away. Ahhh, these modern times. I wonder if Beethoven were alive today if he would be composing or just sitting at a mixing board doing mashups?
Yeah I know - he'd be doing mashups.
Let's just be grateful he isn't alive today.
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